Reasons Not to Pursue a Guy


Paula Hendricks offers up some good, solid, biblical reasons for Christian women not to pursue guys.

Here are reasons to wait for a guy to pursue you:

1. I am already loved completely, passionately, and unconditionally by the greatest Man who ever lived!

What does this have to do with whether I pursue a guy? Everything! I no longer have to search for love or seek to find my worth in a man's desire for me. In fact, God tells me to guard my heart above all else, because everything I do flows from it (Prov. 4:23). His love is enough for me. 

  • "I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness" (Jer. 31:3).
  • How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand-when I awake, I am still with you (Ps.139:17–18).
  • God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins (1 John 4:8–10).

2. I don't know what is best for me, only God does.

How many times have you set your sights on a guy, only to realize later that he grosses you out? I'm afraid I've done that more times than I care to count! That's because:

  • The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it? (Jer. 17:9).
  • Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way (Prov. 19:2).
  • God, on the other hand, knows the hearts of all men (1 Kings 8:39)! You can trust Him to lead and protect you, even when you don't realize you need protecting.
  • Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths (Prov. 3:5–6).

3. God has nothing but good in store for those who wait on Him.

Remind yourself often of these promises from your God who cannot lie:

  • None who wait for you shall be put to shame (Ps. 25:3).
  • For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly (Ps. 84:11).
  • Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good! Blessed is the man who takes refuge in him! (Ps. 34:8).
  • Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind! (Ps. 31:19).
  • "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" (Jer. 29:11).
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