Where You Lead, I Will Follow


What is your reaction when your spouse attempts to lead in the home? How does your response line up with what God says it should be?

I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. Proverbs 4:11

"Why won't you let me lead?"

This question has been asked many times in our years of marriage. I (Teresa) have had to learn to allow my husband to lead. David and I have worked on this issue often. Usually, a particular project or family decision preceded our conflict. David and I would discuss our options, and then after I'd had my say, I left the final choice to him. No sooner was the decision out of his mouth than I would criticize him. Bottom line: I thought he'd made a bad choice, and I was determined to let him know.

I've discovered that David would never learn to be an effective leader in our home if he were not allowed to make choices and even mistakes.

He would never be able to lead in our relationship if I didn't keep quiet about the mistakes and take control of my "I told you so" responses.

I've also discovered that David is less likely to be able to hear God's wisdom if he's too busy trying to defend himself, and he's less likely to dis­cern God's clear direction if he feels put down and distrusted. When we have a decision to make, my best contribution is to give David my sincere, gentle input and then back off. He is then able to pray to God unhindered.

God works through David to care for me and the kids. Trusting God to care for me means I must trust David to lead.

What is your reaction when your spouse attempts to lead in the home? How does that line up with what God says it should be?

Dear God, help me not to arrogantly think I have all the answers. Give me a spirit of submission so that I might be led.


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