I told my husband I feel like sometimes our marriage is more routine than romance.

The other day, JJ and I were talking about how much the demands of life, kids, work, laundry, meals and carpools take so much energy. And how after being married more than 20 years, it feels like romance has gotten lost somewhere.

I used to think my husband didn’t need romance, but he told me he does. And in her book, What a Husband Needs from His Wife, Melanie Chitwood says 84% of the men she surveyed said they want romance. And she shared ways we as wives can bring a little to our marriage.

She suggested we email or text our husband and tell him why we’re attracted to him. Wear his favorite outfit and flirt with him after dinner. Or take him someplace he loves, like a ball game or the home improvement store. Yes, to him, that’s romantic.