When Motherhood Leaves You Wanting
“For I will satisfy the weary soul and every languishing soul I will replenish.” Jeremiah 31:25 (ESV)
But I don’t want to! I thought. Though his ability to jump over a baseball mitt was certainly remarkable for a 3-year-old, I’d already watched him conquer the unprecedented task 48 times (give or take a few), and I was tired.
So I snapped: “NO bud. Mommy’s done.”
What was wrong with me? I was living my dream. It was the one I’d dreamt about since I was a little girl, searching high and low for the Stay-at-Home Mom table on career day.
And now here I was, smack dab in the middle of all I’d ever wanted. Yet all I could think of was being somewhere else. Anywhere, really. The mall … or perhaps a beach with a good book and the ability to take a nap.
It’s different than what I thought it would be, this whole mothering thing. It’s harder. Motherhood requires more selflessness, patience and praying than I ever expected.
I didn’t know I’d have to give until I couldn’t give anymore. I didn’t know I’d be front and center in an epic battle of patience. I didn’t know I’d seek ways to escape — plotting and scheming for just a little alone time. Or that I’d army crawl past the living room, just to use the bathroom by myself.
It just wasn’t what I expected for a dream come true. That whole husband and two (or four) kids and house thing I’d pictured for years and years left me wanting. Wishing for something else (at least for a little while).
It didn’t fill me because it can’t FULFILL me. Only Jesus can: “For he satisfies the longing soul and the hungry soul he fills with good things” (Psalm 107:9, ESV).
Even when we’re tired and rundown and left feeling completely empty, Jesus can satisfy. Did you catch the key verse? “For I will satisfy the weary soul and every languishing soul I will replenish” (Jeremiah 31:25).
Such a beautiful promise for the mama who needs her soul replenished. Or the sister whose dream isn’t quite what she thought it would be. Or the beloved daughter of God who’s been seeking a key to unlock the ever-illusive door of contentment in all the wrong places.
In the book of Matthew, Jesus invites and encourages us to come to Him: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (Matthew 11:28-29, NIV).
In other words Jesus is saying to us, “Why do you seek satisfaction elsewhere when you can find all you’ve ever wanted, right here with Me?”
Though marriage is a gift and babies are a blessing, though jobs are a necessity and dreams are fantastic, though a home is important and it’s good to be healthy — none of it will lead to lasting satisfaction without Jesus. Not even the accomplishment of a pre-pregnancy pant size. (I know, bummer.)
Yet when I seek the presence of a Savior so in love with me He knows every thought, every bruise, every hope I’ve ever held — there is abundant peace to be had. And a fullness of joy only God can give.
Even when it means watching my son jump over a baseball mitt 48 times (give or take a few). So when life or love or motherhood leaves you wanting, seek Jesus, my friend. He’s not only the Savior, He’s the ultimate fulfillment of all we truly savor.
Dear Lord, help me seek You first and foremost in my life. Fill me with a desire to know You more, and help me delight myself in You and not the things of this world. Replenish my weary soul and satisfy me with Your perfect presence. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
TRUTH FOR TODAY:
Isaiah 58:11, “And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.” (ESV)
Psalm 90:14, “Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.” (ESV)
REFLECT AND RESPOND:
In what situation do you find yourself wanting today? Are you seeking fulfillment there or in Jesus Christ?