When In Doubt
“He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.” Psalm 18:19 (niv)
Weary, beat-up and burned-out, I had reached a point where I was questioning everything. Especially the persistent whisper of God to write, of all things, Christian books. I was still the mom of young children. I had written one book, but wasn’t sure what was next. My husband was wondering why I didn’t find a job in PR or some other more lucrative form of writing. I was overcommitted at church and at my kids’ school—hemmed in by a fence I’d built myself.
On the advice of a mentor, I scheduled a day of solitude at a retreat center. I needed some time with Jesus, just the two of us. I prayed, searching the psalms for the comfort they always bring. I lingered in psalm 18, making its laments my own, longing for its promises to be true. Needing fresh air, I took a walk, following a path through a small woodland, praying as I went. Don’t you have enough Christian book writers? I asked Jesus. I’m pretty busy.
The path through the woods led to a huge open field bordered on all four sides by ancient woods. I stood in that spacious place, which Jesus had brought me to. I listened, recalled the words I’d read. And believed—He delighted in me. I had been rescued by Jesus, who’d saved me for a purpose. Did I trust His calling? Could I rest in that spacious place, enjoy the fact that in spite of my questions and doubts, He delighted in me? In that spacious place, God gave me a picture of what my life could be if I said no to all the things that cluttered it, so I could say yes to His purpose for me.
FAITH STEP: Is there an area in your life where you feel crowded by questions and doubts? Where you are questioning God’s calling? Ask Him to bring you to a spacious place, where you can feel His delight in you.
Written by Keri Wyatt Kent
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