What to Do When You Feel Like Judas
“The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved—loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves.” —Victor Hugo
By the time they shared their last supper alone together, Jesus and His disciples had been living day in and day out together for three years. They knew each other very well… or so they thought. One of them was about to betray Jesus, and the moment must have been intensely awkward:
“I am telling you now before it happens, so that when it does happen you will believe that I am who I am.”… Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified, “Very truly I tell you, one of you is going to betray me.” So Jesus told him [Judas], “What you are about to do, do quickly.” But no one at the meal understood why Jesus said this to him… As soon as Judas had taken the bread, he went out. And it was night. —John 13:19, 21, 27-28, 30
Our flesh and mind are still vulnerable to temptation. This can lead to “betrayals” of many kinds. Sometimes, you might even feel like Judas… a haunting awkwardness followed by the feeling that you have left Jesus and gone out into the night by yourself. Yeah, you might feel that way, but the cool thing is that Jesus hasn’t left you at all! If you have given your life to Christ and asked Him to come in, He has done just that! His Spirit now lives in your spirit. You can rest in His promise that He will never forsake you and never reject you (Hebrews 13:5).
Jesus, I praise You for Your unconditional love that is infinitely greater than my betrayals. Though I feel distant from You when I sin, I thank You for Your promise that You will be with me always (Matthew 28:20). Use my sin as a graphic reminder of Your forgiveness, mercy, and grace so that I will rest and depend on You to live through me. Amen!