What’s the Temperature of Your Marriage?


Dr. Randy Carlson helps you evaluate the health of your marriage and encourages you to rekindle the romance.

Have you ever wanted to know how to evaluate the health of your marriage? There are simple filters that reveal the “spiritual temperature” of your relationship.

You can get an accurate view of how your marriage is doing from a biblical perspective. You can see how you’re doing emotionally and spiritually simply by looking at these straightforward Scriptures written by the apostle Paul:

  1. “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22 (NIV)
  2. “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Ephesians 5:25 (NIV)

Think about God’s Word and what it means for your daily life and for your marriage. Let God’s Word be the key to revealing the spiritual temperature in your marriage. Read these verses carefully. Then see that:

  • For the wife, biblical submission means having an agreeable attitude that helps the overall relationship—it does not mean blind obedience.
  • For the husband, there’s no higher calling! To love your wife as Jesus loves you means to deny yourself and care for your wife, even to the point of death.

Do you intentionally live out these commands in how you feel about and act toward your spouse? If so, your spiritual temperature – how your marriage is doing at its deepest levels – is healthy and strong. It’s easy, however, to take your spouse for granted after you’ve been married a while. You become comfortable and familiar. Maybe you’ve stopped doing the little things that made a difference—the things that made him or her feel special and deeply loved.

Don’t forget what made your relationship great. Put the romance back in your relationship. Love and respect grow when husbands and wives remember what made their relationship great. A shared intimacy can bring the sparks back. Consider some ONE THINGS you can do to reignite that passion:

  • Talk about your first date
  • Go on a picnic
  • Hold hands
  • Flirt
  • Give five-second hugs
  • Leave your spouse love notes
  • Plan a weekly date night
  • Talk to each other at least 15 minutes a day

Above all, put forth extra effort to rekindle the romance. A willingness to become intimate, and express intimacy in healthy ways, works. You can create a plan for romance. Make a decision today to be intentional about what you do.


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