Dannah Gresh offers accountability tips for those struggling with lustful temptations.
A few weeks ago, a colleague in the Christian publishing and speaking world suddenly needed an audience with me and my team...and fast. You see, over the weekend his eight-year-old daughter had a sleepover with a nine-year-old friend. When his fourteen-year-old got on the Internet after they’d used it, she found herself seeing images no girl (or woman, for that matter) should ever see. His heart was broken by the fact that both of his little girls had been forced to look at images that rip the innocence right out of girlhood. It should not surprise you that this happened. It happens in most houses everyday. It may be that you were the eight year old, or the fourteen year old that it happened to.
The fourth most-searched word on the Internet for kids ages 7 and under in 2009 was “porn.” For all kids up to age 18, sex was No. 4, porn No. 5. (According to data collected by OnlineFamily.Norton.com.) This supports some research I saw a few years ago out of Britain, stating that the average age of the first inception of pornography has dropped from around twelve or thirteen to age seven or eight. Seen any lately?
Job 31:1 records Job’s promise to God. He’d made a covenant with his eyes to look at no vile thing. Have you made just a covenant? If not, it’s not too late. Here are a few steps you need to take to be successful.
#1) Place computers in public rooms. Avoid bedrooms or dens where doors can be closed. If you have a laptop, talk to your parents about where you can use it so that you are never alone.
#2) Install Internet filters or accountability software.In our home, we use both SafeEyes and Covenant Eyes. Both have web addresses by their names and can be easily explored. You’ll need an accountability partner to help you with this. I suggest your mom and dad, since you’ll have to use the family’s entire server to install the filter.
#3) Tell someone. Just a few weeks ago, at True Woman, a teen who attended came up to me so ashamed that she’d been struggling with porn and masturbation. Though she had finally stopped looking at porn, she couldn’t stop masturbating. We were able to pray together and it was so freeing for her to tell someone. James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins one to another and then you will be healed.” That’s what happened to her that day. She felt the healing. And, I encouraged her to tell her mom, so I’m sure the healing will continue and she’ll find victory!
You can be victorious, but don’t try to do it alone. Tell someone!