What about unresolved anger makes it so damaging to relationships?
How destructive bottled-up resentment can be! Anger has many tragic consequences in a marriage. It creates distance and pushes us into darkness. It can tie our emotions and decisions into knots. We may not be able to keep anger from cropping up as an instantaneous and instinctive reaction to some pain or problem, but we can make a decision to keep it from staying in our lives and poisoning our attitudes or the attitudes of our loved ones.
Constant disagreement can only weaken a marriage relationship. That’s probably why Paul emphasized having oneness of spirit and mind in the Church. He likened the struggle for oneness to a team of athletes striving to reach the goal.
In relating to others, are you shifted to one extreme or the other? Are you camped in the far reaches of the confrontative life, easily issuing commands and criticism but not given to caring actions? Or do you rarely move beyond an unhealthy avoidance lifestyle, unwilling to confront someone to take the lead?
Unresolved anger in your home is more toxic than the radon gas! Commit to resolving anger to secure a forever marriage.
The build-up of unresolved anger results in a closed spirit. Selfish anger is the negative emotion we feel when a person or situation has failed to meet our needs, blocked our goals, or fallen short of our expectations. If you are constantly dishonoring your spouse for one reason or another, it will usually close his or her spirit.
Anger creates distance, and distance destroys relationships. It causes husbands and wives and parents and children to drift away from each other. Home becomes little more than a dormitory with hostile roommates. No matter how hard we work at the relational “glue” that bonds our families together, anger is like fingernail polish remover that instantly dissolves that bonding.