The Weight of the Wait
“Lord, you have been our home since the beginning.” Psalm 90:1 (NCV)
Shuffling through my small Kentucky kitchen, I flipped the calendar page. I turned to October 2008 — new month of the year, same cry of my heart.
Time was younger then, and so were we. We’d moved a lot, and while I believe those years of wandering were part of God’s plan, I longed to feel at home … somewhere. We’d had happy times; there wasn’t an absence of joy. But my heart craved home.
That October day, we had a house for sale in one state while living in another. Life was less than settled, and I was less than patient. Weary and spent, I lifted the calendar page to expose a new month — more time that wouldn’t cooperate with the longing of my heart.
And there, in that modest rental kitchen, God met me.
The words hidden beneath a fresh autumn month read, “Lord, you have been our home since the beginning. Psalm 90:1.”
With the casual turning of a page, I felt God whisper, “Psst, I know. It matters to Me. I’ve got this. But hey, by the way — what you long for, you already have. You’ve had it since the beginning. I am your Home.”
I never needed anything else. My security, comfort and contentment were in Him. The Home my heart craved from the beginning.
As He spoke shelter over me that morning, the wait began to feel more like an invitation than a burden.
Of course, there’s always a pesky human element to waiting that can feel heavy at times. But He’s been teaching me over the years that what my heart longs for can’t be satisfied by what my life longs for. The temporal can’t pacify the eternal.
And please know, I am not an honor student in this course. In fact, I seem to be enrolled in the perpetual refresher class, as it’s a lesson I’m forever learning. Even now, many years after being graciously settled in a place we adore, I still yearn for a version of home yet unknown. Country roads. Split-rail fences. Fresh air. Open space.
What about you, friend? Are you in an interim season that feels heavy right now? Have you, too, ever found yourself forfeiting the invitation to abide while stalled in the seclusion of the wait?
We’re so prone to searching for home in containers not made to carry its calling — whether in place or people, title or position, acceptance or belonging — we instinctively seek to satisfy its heaviness by human means.
Oh, to surrender instead to eternal means — for He longs to satisfy the wait with Himself.
Dear God, please give us a heart for the now, not the next. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
TRUTH FOR TODAY:
1 Timothy 6:6, “But godliness with contentment is great gain." (NIV)
Psalm 23:1, "The LORD is my shepherd; I have all that I need." (NLT)
Psalm 27:14, "Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." (NIV)
Today’s devotion was written by Brenda Bradford Ottinger, a member of COMPEL, a membership site for those who want to write words that move people. Registration opens a few times a year, but SURPRISE! For the next 24 hours only, we're holding a pop-up open registration for COMPEL membership! Embrace your calling to write and sign up to receive the tools and skills you need to hone your craft. Registration closes tonight at 11:59 p.m. EST — so don't miss out! Click here to learn more.
REFLECT AND RESPOND:
What is your default response to the weight of the wait? Consider what it might mean for you to surrender and abide in the midst of the wait.
How might this perspective offer peace and contentment to the longing of your heart?