The Power of Harmony


What steps can you and your spouse take to be in harmony with God and with one another?

For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain. Philippians 1:21

Doug and Pam fought constantly over how to raise their children. There were many issues: Should the kids be made to say their nightly prayers? What TV programs should they be allowed to view? Their list of parenting conflicts was endless, and they presented them for me (David) to referee.

My response to their questions shocked them: "The main issue isn't how you deal with these issues. The main issue is your harmony about the answer." Having two adult parents in oneness on an issue is more important to a child than the "perfect" answer about bedtime, TV, diet, or teeth brushing, as it brings them freedom from anxiety over parental conflict.

Over several decades of marriage and family life, we have learned this truth: What we often think is the issue is not the issue. We have learned that the Lord may often use these "surface" conflicts in order to address deeper issues—namely, our own harmony with God.

Romans 8:28-29 reminds us that as believers we've been "predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son." When God works within me to bring forth the selfless and gentle love of Christ—that is, when He moves me to put "self" to death—my heart and mind become His heart and mind. And when He does a similar work in Teresa, His heart and His mind prevail, and we have harmony with God and with one another.

God doesn't argue with Himself. And the testimony of two becoming one—true harmony—is evidence of the mystery of Christ's love for His church (see Ephesians 5:1-2). When we have this harmony with God, we can have true harmony with one another.

What steps can you and your spouse take to be in harmony with God and with one another?

Lord, help us to walk in harmony with You that we might walk in harmony with one another.

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