The Mirror Staring Back at Me


Courtney DeFeo, Christian mom and blogger, reflects on motherhood on Mother's Day eve.

It’s Mother’s Day eve… so just like the day before a big birthday, a kindergarten send off – anything sentimental I get a little reflective and sappy. And this moment just sent me over the edge.

We have been having some ROUGH, I mean ROUGH car rides in the afternoon people. One tired child meets one excited child and they clash and it goes south. I’ve tried slurpies, silence, treats, movies, consequences, begging, kissing, singing and more.

Yesterday, it was like heaven. I was in my world with some music and they were just giggling their heads off all the way home. So happy to see each. Planning the afternoon together. And I could barely see the rear view mirror as I sat at the light in tears. Grateful. A good day. A great moment. A glimpse of what I know is true.

They do love each other and I love them.

That mirror shows me the sweetest grins from them.

Shows me their singing faces to songs of truth that I’m praying will root deep in their hearts.

It shows me sunken hearts when they are defeated.

It shows me scared bodies that aren’t ready for a day they fear.

It shows me two little versions of me and Ron.

It shows me big girls that used to be babies.

That mirror shows me my world.

So much love I could cry on the spot if the light is too long.

If I turn the mirror towards me… it reveals a bunch about me too.

It reveals tired and weary.

It reveals too hard on herself and busy.

It also reveals the truth.

It reveals a giver, a lover of life, a passion for others and God.

I get to choose what I see and how I let it sink and settle.

Like any mirror, will it define my image and the image of my life? Or just remind of the beauty?

The great things… for which I am thankful.

For this day, that mirror gave me a great view and a great reminder. The image staring back at me is what makes this Mother’s Day a very, very happy one. I am so overwhelmed they are mine.

Much love you precious moms.

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