The Look and Sound of Approval


Are you sensitive to your spouse's need for approval?

Give, and it will be given to you. Luke 6:38, NASB

In my years as a seminar speaker, I (Teresa) have met many women who never receive their husband's approval. Instead, they have been criticized—for their size, the way they dress, how they keep house, or for their cooking. These women would all tell you how terribly it hurts to receive nothing but disapproval from their spouses.

On the other hand, I've also seen men who long to hear some approving words from their wives. Their wives make sure to point out the slightest flaw or imperfection in their performance. Their wives' words and attitudes have wounded these men deeply.

David has set the standard in our family in this area. He never puts me down, criticizes me, or picks over my faults. Instead, he makes it a point to approve of me in his deeds and in his words. And that has proved to be contagious. The more David honors me by showing his approval, the more I've wanted to do the same for him.

Here's what showing approval might look like:

  • Displaying photos of your spouse on your desk or in your home.
  • Taking photos or videos of your spouse's important life events.
  • Wanting your friends or coworkers to meet your spouse.

Here's what giving approval might sound like:

"I'm so proud to be your wife. I am so thankful that God brought us together."

"I'm proud of you. It was such a blessing to sit in the audience tonight and know that I'm married to that wonderful woman up there!"

"I am so glad to be married to your son or daughter. He or she is God's precious gift for me" (said to spouse's parents).

What can you do and say today to show your spouse the approval he or she needs from you?

Lord, make me sensitive to my spouse's need for approval. Alert me to opportunities to show him or her—in deed and in word—approval.

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