The Agony of Alone


The reality is sometimes you are the only one able to keep moving forward, and it’s your turn to lead. When you start to wear out, God will send His refreshment.

Parents, there are times when we must walk alone.

Our kids, our spouses and our friends get uber-busy, totally distracted and generally overwhelmed by the drama of life. When they do, we can start to drift a bit further away…simply to protect ourselves from their personal stresses draining us of what little reserves we still have left.

The reality is sometimes we are the only one able to keep moving forward, and it’s our turn to lead.

To risk walking into the wild alone, to knowingly endure the isolation. To stand firm, feeling like you’re the sole representation of strength and sanity in a world of exhausted, exasperated and crazy. It’s a heavy burden to carry. 

But just when we start to wear out, God sends refreshment or forces us to take a time out for our self. Raising up stronger – rested folks to cover our weakness just when we’re about to fade completely out or pushing us into an adult version of “time-out”.

Whatever your situation, it’s likely your reading this blog in part because your feeling “alone”, isolated and empty. My encouragement is to trust that your creator knows you better than you.

His path can seem twisted and often leading in the “opposite” direction we want to go, but in the end… our faith draws us closer and it chooses for us, to believe when nothing around inspires. It’s that deep-down faith that insists it’s worth the effort to stick with the divine map drawn for our lives, no matter how empty or alone we feel.

It was a common thing for Christ to withdraw from the crowds when He was on earth, to refresh Himself on a mountain top and be alone with His heavenly father, it’s no surprise then that we might require the exact same “medicine” to refresh ourselves.

It’s also true that Christ himself had to go through the “agony of alone“. He thrashed in isolation at the garden of Gethsemane, endured the injustice of the courtroom alone and approached the shame of a criminal’s death by himself.

The suffering we feel as “alone” cannot be fully felt or shared with anyone else but the son of God. As parents, BFF”s and spouses… we believe in relying on each other, but in the end we will find those rare moments when all others we’ve counted on are gone or otherwise “occupied” and we have to move forward with just our faith in Christ to comfort and encourage us.

It’s in those times we grow. 

Our roots go deeper and our courage grows stronger, not because of any personal triumph we achieve, but from the reality of our faith becoming “tangible” and “real” in the midst of impossible odds and un-reasonable demands. Problems that overwhelm us, stuff so big, we have no-hope of ever meeting or completing.

It’s time to “let go” and trust God to make up for our shortcomings. 

It’s time to “trust” that He has things under control. 

It’s time to “listen” instead of demanding things change. 

It’s time to “rest” in the middle of our storms. 

God is pursuing each one of us, and like the disciples… He has a unique and creative plan for our life, one that we can only live out if we choose to surrender it to Him.

It will be the same for our kids as it is for us.

Don’t fake it, don’t smooth the rough patches of life over… let your pre-teens/teens see the struggle and hear the tears. Real life is coming to each one of us and learning to turn to our heavenly father with our pain is the best “life-lesson’ we could ever hope to share.

Hebrews 13:5 (Amplified Bible)

Let your character or moral disposition be free from love of money [including greed, avarice, lust, and craving for earthly possessions] and be satisfied with your present [circumstances and with what you have]; for He [God]Himself has said, I will not in any way fail you nor give you up nor leave you without support. [I will] not, [I will] not, [I will] not in any degree leave you helpless nor forsake nor let [you] down (relax My hold on you)! [Assuredly not!]

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