Stop Targeting Me with Sex
Modern culture is trying to teach us what love is, but it’s all wrong.
Miley Cyrus twerked with a foam finger. Robin Thicke “knows we want it,” and The Bachelor pits women against each other as they compete to marry a millionaire. Even video games like Grand Theft Auto parade scantily-clad women across our screens with little or no concern.
The goal is to entertain us, men and young men in particular, and to convince us if we just buy the products and live the lifestyle that we’ll fit in. It promises sexual fulfillment whenever we want it, however we want it—all without consequences. It tells us to do what we want, because we deserve to be happy.
Don’t Buy the Lie
Sleeping around, watching porn and dismissing the seriousness of sex only leaves us feeling guilty and unfulfilled. Culture presents a distortion of the truth and misleads us into thinking sex is a strictly physical need like eating or breathing. Sex is more than a physical thing, and it shouldn’t be casually tossed around.
Oversexed culture says it’s admirable for guys, single or not, to meet as many beautiful women as possible. It insists on seeking better sexual partners. It says, “Hook up, shack up and break up as fast as possible,” then move on, regardless of how much emotional pain it causes.
A vast majority of men are exposed to pornography at a young age. Because most friends follow along, there’s no one to encourage young men to say “No.” Countless men forget women have souls and need kindness. Instead, porn tells us to use women for our pleasure, no matter how much dignity it strips them of.
Oversexed culture tells us to use Valentine’s Day to get into women’s pants. It says impressing women will get us laid, and romance is just a tool to earn a one-night stand.
Oversexed culture tells us love is about sex, using a woman until a man gets everything he wants. Websites, movies and magazines treat men like a sex-crazed monsters—monsters driven by their selfish desires, incapable of thinking about right and wrong and other people.
Men Are Meant for More
Men are not monsters. We are humans. We’re not perfect, and we don’t treat every woman with the respect they should. But we’re works in progress, and some are trying to turn away from misusing sexuality, because it’s actually a good gift God created for us.
God calls us His children and promises new lives, free from slavery to sin (Galatians 4:3-7). Our identities aren’t determined by how many sex partners we’ve had, or our failures, but by God’s grace and what He’s created us to do (Ephesians 2:8-10).
Culture uses sex to get our attention, but our attention is not theirs to have. Our lives find purpose in Jesus, not in our sexual gratification. Let’s look for an honorable legacy, not a temporary thrill. Let’s trust God will provide what He thinks is best for us, including what beautiful, godly woman each of us will spend our lives loving and serving in intimate, faithful marriage-- the context sex deserves.
Written by John Weirick