Should My Best Friend and I Go to the Same College?


Judy Moseman addresses how friends should factor into your decision to choose the right college.

Q. My best friend and I have decided to apply to the same school. But my youth pastor says that's probably not the best idea. He's encouraged us to go to different schools, so we can make new friends. I think he feels we depend on each other too much. We've been best friends since first grade. It's kind of hard to imagine not being around each other. Do you think it's OK for us to look at the same schools or do you think we should listen to my youth pastor?

A. Youth pastors are worth listening to, and by the way you worded your question. I can tell you understand your youth pastor's concerns. I agree with him that this is a great time for you and your best friend to expand your horizons and make some new friends. But I also think that can happen even if you both attend the same school. However, you both need to explore your options and choose the school that is best for you personally. If it happens that you choose the same one, you can take some of your youth pastor's advice by not being roommates. Instead, you can make it work by living in different residence halls, or at least on different floors of the same dorm. Make an effort to participate in activities, because you enjoy doing them, and not because they're things your friend likes to do.

Many friendships change during the college years. You may grow apart from your friend, even if you are enrolled at the same college. That's why it's so important that you and your friend each be led by God to the college that fits you best. I hope you both have a great experience wherever that may be, and that your friendship, along with the others you make in college, will be a lifelong blessing!

Written by Judy Moseman

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