Relax a Little


Don't fall into the trap of an overly busy life. You need uninterrupted time with your spouse to develop emotional intimacy.

Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life. Ecclesiastes 9:9

I just love it when David takes a Monday or Friday off so that we can both relax and just enjoy one another's company. These days feel like holidays to me. We don't have to plan our day. We don't need any kind of agenda. We don't need to do anything but enjoy being with each other.

The world tries to convince us that we constantly need to be "doing" something. Consequently, we can fall into the trap of an overly busy life. When we stop enjoying just being in each other's presence, it's usually a sign we've given over more of ourselves than is healthy to keeping ourselves "busy.' How can we feel romantic or get to know one another on a deeper emotional level unless we make time to enjoy each other—alone, without the kids or anyone else around, and without "doing" something?

It's this rebuke of anxious "busyness" that we hear in Christ's words to His friend when He says, "Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things" (Luke 10:41). Activity was hindering Martha's relationship with Christ, and that is never good. Activities are to serve relationships through shared joy and common experience, but never to supplant them.

Mary, Martha's sister, was affirmed in her focus on relationship as Christ said, "Mary has chosen what is better" (Luke 10:42, NIV). It seems insightful that Christ specifically refers to Mary "choosing" to give priority to relationship. This demonstrates to us that we don't simply slip into intimate fellowship and close friendship—we have to choose.

We should all follow Mary's example and focus on relationship first—with our God first, then with our spouses.

What steps can you take to be certain you have time with your spouse—
alone, uninterrupted, and with nothing planned to "do"?

Lord, help me to stay out of the world's trap of the tyranny of urgency and remember to take time to relax with my spouse.

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