Mom: Control or Trust?
The Control Trap
Mothers tend to have control issues. From the prenatal list of do’s and don’ts, to the panic attacks when our baby starts driving, from the “Be careful” as our child is climbing a tree to the daily hygiene reminders as he reaches puberty. We moms want to make sure everything and everyone is safe and in order.
Our tendency to micromanage and freak out can be understood. We have a lot of time and love invested in our children. We transport them back and forth to school and sports events, care for them when they’re sick, read to them, teach them, sing to them, cry with them, and laugh hysterically with them. We clean up after them, feed them, make sure their physical needs are met, cheer loudest at their sporting events and contests, and dream dreams for their futures.
However, when we forget something, we are tempted to wallow in guilt. We feel we don’t measure up when our child gets hurt or in trouble. The lie we believe is if we do everything right, hold it all together, our kids are going to turn out ok, but if we miss a step…who knows what may happen!
Choosing to trust
There’s no denying moms have a long list of responsibilities, many which are God given. God has given us amazing capabilities to handle these responsibilities, but he doesn’t mean for us to do the job alone. God taught me a lot about trusting Him when my son was suffering from seizures during a week-long hospital stay. Questions I couldn’t answer, days of sleep deprivation, and physical symptoms I couldn’t fix led me to the hardest prayer I’ve ever prayed: "God, he’s yours.” I knew I wasn’t in control and was able to rest in the truth that God is, and He loves my son even more than me.
Moms, you can stop fighting. God is in control and is your helper. Follow Jesus as you raise your children. Serve them as He served (Mark 10:45). Love them sacrificially as He loved (1 John 3:16). Provide for them as He provides (Matthew 7:11). Don’t forget to trust as He trusted (Luke 22:42). Let Psalm 73:23-24, 26 be your prayer of strength, “I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel…My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
Don’t get caught in the control trap. When we give up the struggle for control, raising our kids becomes more enjoyable. We can watch them do a new activity with excitement that they are growing and learning. We find a new perspective in the squeals and laughter that tend to push us over the edge after a long day. When they are sick, we are still concerned, but have peace in knowing God is taking care of them. We may even catch a fleeting moment of thankfulness for the housework we feel we’re doing for the tenth time this week! Life came through us and life surrounds us. Thank God for He has entrusted us with a blessed responsibility…being a mom!
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