Listening to the Father's Heart - April 11


Son, learn to identify with the pain you cause, even if you cause it unintentionally.

Son, by now you understand how differently sons and daughters view life. As a man, when you justify your behavior, valid or not, you bring attention to yourself instead of acknowledging how you hurt the other person.  Son, this is pride. This is self-focus. But to do otherwise will have to be a learned behavior for my sons.  It will never come naturally.  Daughters will always be convinced that my sons do hurtful things intentionally, when in fact, my sons rarely intend this hurt. It's more about their inability to identify with the feelings of their sisters or grasp how their actions impact them. It’s about learning to identify with the pain you cause, even if done unintentionally. 

Often a daughter’s perception is: "You don't care how you hurt me." Here is my suggestion to you, son: Ask questions instead of defending yourself. Resist the temptation to justify or explain why you did what you did. Simply acknowledge where you failed and ask forgiveness. Reason and logic may be good for winning arguments, but not for connecting with another’s heart. Learn this principle and your close relationships will thrive.

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

Every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the hearts. Proverbs 21:2 

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