Letting Go of Perfectionism


Our need for control has the potential to bring us the greatest heartache and frustration.

“If you take the left, then I will go the right; or, if you go to the right, then I will go to the left” (Genesis 13:9).

In this passage Abram, later known as Abraham, is talking to his nephew, Lot and giving Lot first choice of the land. Abram was the one who had first choice of the land, but he chose to give it to Lot.

This month I talked about perfectionism. Perfectionism really boils down to control and our need and desire to control ALL things. Our need for control has the potential to bring us the greatest heartache and frustration. Being a perfectionist can/will result in heartbreak as we realize that no one wants to be around us because of our constant desire to make things perfect. We are also frustrated because the more we try to control the more we lose control or the harder it becomes to maintain control.

Let’s look again at Abram. God had given Abram all of the land. Abram then gives first choice of the land to his nephew Lot. Lot ended up choosing the best piece of land for him and his family. It says in verse 10, “Lot looked up and saw that the whole plain of the Jordan was well watered, like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt, toward Zoar. So, Lot chose for himself the whole plain of the Jordan and set out toward the east.”

Here is my point, in life we want to control every outcome. Being perfectionists, we want to orchestrate all choices and outcomes. Sadly, we perfectionists would have chosen the best part of land for ourselves. And by letting Lot choose Abram, gave up his right to the best land. Abram did not care to control the situation or to manipulate for his behalf because Abram’s trust was in God, not the land or the decision. Think about that for a minute. If we, as moms, would develop this type of mindset, we would be unstoppable. Our trust needs to be in our Heavenly Father, not ourselves. We need to allow God to work and do His will, not us trying to manipulate and orchestrate what we think is best for us.

I love Abram’s faith in God. He put his trust in God and let’s look and see how God blessed him. Keep in mind, when Abram told Lot to choose, he had no idea what the outcome would be. Let’s pick the story back up in verse 14, “The Lord said to Abram after Lot had parted from him, “Lift up your eyes from where you are and look north and south, east and west. All the land that you see I will give to you and your offspring like the dust of the earth, so that if anyone could count the dust, then your offspring could be counted. Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you.”

God wants to bless us. We need to choose to trust in Him.

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