Let's Go Outside!


What plans will you make today to spend time with your spouse?

Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another. Hebrews 10:25, NIV

I (Teresa) love to be out in my yard. I always have. In fact, some of my fondest childhood memories are of things that took place in our backyard.

During one of our conferences, I began to reflect on some of the posi­tive memories of my childhood. As I was growing up, my family always went outside in the evening. Mom worked crossword puzzles, Dad watered the yard, and we kids played in the yard. Those were special times because that was when I had Mom and Dad's attention.

Suddenly, it hit me: Because I had enjoyed those times outside with my parents, I came to associate being outside with my need for attention. I enjoyed being outside for the sake of being outdoors, but there was also an important emotional component. When I was outside, I felt loved, valued, and cared for. In reality, when I asked David to come outside and work with me, I was really expressing the need to receive the kind of attention and feel the kind of feelings I felt as a child.

Understanding this connection helped me see that David could spend time with me in ways other than going outside. He could meet my need for attention in ways such as going for a walk with me in the mall, taking me to a movie, or taking me out to a quiet dinner.

Now David and I can both enjoy being outside. I can putter around the yard while he reads or writes, because my real need is to be close to him. I've realized that my husband's willingness to be with me has confirmed within me God's love, which He manifests through David. And as the years have gone by, what we're doing seems less important than our just being together.

What plans will you make today just to spend time with your spouse?

Lord, help me see my spouse's need just to spend time with me.

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