I've noticed something lately among the young women I hear from. Many of you are committed to purity—meaning you're willing to wait on God's timing for love, romance, and physical intimacy. That is until you're tested and then it seems, all too often, those plans for purity fly right out the window.
Here are some examples of what I've heard from young women just like you.
I'm committed to purity until a cute boy who I really like pays attention to me.
I'm committed to purity until a sexually charged movie comes out and all my friends are talking about it. Of course I'm going to watch it, too. It's just a movie, right?
I'm committed to purity until my boyfriend and I fall in love.
I'm committed to purity until a song with steamy lyrics comes out with a catchy beat.
Or here's the one I seem to be hearing most often lately.
I'm committed to purity until I reach the age that I'm tired of being single, at which point I'm willing to compromise because I thought I'd be married by now.
Basically these girls have told me that they are committed to purity until there is a cost. That means there's not really a commitment at all.
Before I go any further, let me give you my definition of purity. I'm not just talking about waiting to cross the BIG line before you're married, although that's certainly a part of remaining pure. I'm talking about waiting on God's timing for romance, maintaining standards of physical contact that reserve the very best of you for marriage, and protecting your heart and mind from ideas about love that don't line up with God's standards. Under that definition of purity, we all have work to do (even us old, married types). I'd guess that most of us are guilty of saying we stand for purity until we get tired of waiting, or protecting, or guarding, and then we renege on our decision to do things God's way.
When I was pondering how to respond to the many girls who write to me with stories of pure until _____, I dug into God's Word for some guidance. Check out what I found:
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up (Gal. 6:9).
Maintaining pure thoughts, pure actions, and pure relationships is tough. Let me try again. It's difficult, backbreaking, brutal, strenuous, trying, arduous ... well, you get the point. But if we only keep our commitment to God's standards while they're easy, we stand to lose out, big time!
My goal isn't to beat you over the head with another message about why purity matters or to make you feel battered if you've messed up in this area, but rather to say keep going, girl! Purity is possible. Purity is worth it. Stand firm.
Striving for purity can certainly wear us out, but Galatians 6:9 tells us not to become weary of doing the good God has called us to. And what is the promise? That eventually, if we hold our ground, we will snag the victory.
