How to Love Your Wife


A man should know his wife as well as he knows his own body.

A man who loves his wife sacrificially loves her in a satisfying way. If husband and wife are “one flesh” in marriage, then to hurt her is to hurt himself, and to do good to her is to do good to himself. Husbands are to know what is satisfying to their wives, and to seek to give those things. So husbands, do you know those things?

To determine whether or not I knew the things that were satisfying to my wife, I gave myself a little test. Let me encourage you to try it, too. I wrote down on a piece of paper three things I believed my wife enjoyed. Then I gave her the paper, and asked her to “grade” it. I was one for three. It’s funny—no woman, or very few, could live with a man for long and not score 100 percent on such a test. But we men are not so observant.

Paul understood this gender difference and encouraged men to love their wives as they loved their own bodies. Men know their bodies. They know how much they weigh, and what they like to eat, and how many cups of coffee will keep them awake at night. They know how many miles they can jog before their knees begin to ache, and whether a nagging pain can be ignored or needs a doctor’s attention. They listen to their bodies.

Imagine how many marriages would improve if a man attempted to know his wife as well as he knew his own body, and to treat her with as much care as his own flesh! Husbands...that’s how to love your wife!

So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies.
Deuteronomy 7-8; Matthew 4

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