Q: My older daughter is 12 years older than her sibling and is now baby-sitting for us. This is infrequent and usually after the baby's bedtime or during her nap time on Saturday or Sunday when hubby and I can catch some time out of the house alone. Her stepmother has told her we don't pay her a sufficient allowance and that we should pay her for baby-sitting and other chores. That got me to thinking. Should we?

My advice is to ignore the Evil Stepmother. Do not even engage with your daughter in discussions concerning what she says about chores, allowances, and the like. Simply point out to your daughter that the word "family" means not just parents and children who live together, but "people who live together in a cooperative arrangement." In short, the people who make up a family help each other, and one way your daughter can be of help to the entire family—one way she can be a good citizen of the family—is to baby-sit.