God Holds My Tomorrows
I stood looking in the mirror trying to pull out yet another wild, gray hair when I realized I couldn't see the thing without my reading glasses! However, I did notice I could clearly see the deep wrinkles on my forehead and around my eyes, even without my new readers. Where have the years gone? My recent hysterectomy has cured my hot flashes, but I now know the meaning of muffin top—and I don't mean the kind you can get at Panera!
To tell you the truth, I could almost be distracted by my aging body if it weren't for my rapidly-changing life. It seems my kids have grown up without even asking my permission, in the proverbial blink of an eye, and are leaving my nest. No one asked me if I was ready for all of this or properly warned me it was coming. I do admit I totally ignored all those folks saying, "Your kids will grow up so fast" over the years. I'm not ready, and looking at my retirement account, it isn't ready either for the number of candles on my cake!
Almost a Pity Party
And if you give me a few more moments I could list many more things that, if I'm not careful, could tempt me into hosting my own pity party. Things like aging parents soon to be in need of more help, aches and pains in diverse places, a husband complaining of a balding head and nose hairs (what?), and many more life changes! I can laugh at some of it but, to be honest, I am also crying. I feel really sad. You know, sad like a good cry might help—but only temporarily.
As I lay in bed the other night, I began talking to my Father over the sounds of my sweet husband's increasing-with-age snores. I began to tell God how I felt: "I am not ready for my kids to be so grown-up and on their own. I even miss the chaos of little muddy feet and balls being thrown in my house. I miss holding them. I wonder just how far away they will move, and though I am happy for all of their opportunities, I miss them—and a couple of them haven't even left yet."
I know God has been faithful in the past, but can He help me with this sadness and this new host of emotions?
The God of "He Will"
As I lay there in the dark, it hit me. God isn't just the God of "He did" or "He is." He is also the God of "He will" and "He can." He hasn't taken away the emotions. He hasn't shown me how we will walk together in joy in this new phase of life, but He assured me He is already there, that He is enough for my sad momma heart and that He will help me rest.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matt 11:28).
Although, as women we get stuck with the title of the "emotional ones," God chose to tell us about one of His men with a few up and down emotions. In Psalm 13:2, David writes, "How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me?" When David wrote this, his enemies were encamped around him. He was depressed and afraid, and in his mind, he wrestled with his fears. Only after telling God of his worries did his emotions shift. David ended the psalm by saying, "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing the LORD's praise, for he has been good to me" (vv. 5–6).
A Prescription for Worry
Once again, God was using His Word to encourage me and help me see how to find hope and rest despite my sadness. In these few short verses, we see a prescription for battling the thoughts and worries that overcome us:
- Give your burden to God. Tell Him what you are worried about.
- State your trust in God. Instead of focusing on your problem, focus on His character and capability (not on your character or abilities or the way you feel).
- Realize your ultimate salvation is already secured. The most important battle is already won. Problems and emotions real and perceived will not always plague you.
- Remember God's faithfulness in the past, and praise Him for He will not forsake you in the future either. Trust that He will give you rest.
And so the God of "He did" and "He is" is also the God of "He will" and "He can" for every emotion and every circumstance that will come my way—and yours.
And for what it's worth... bangs cover a multitude of wrinkles.
Written by Kim Jaggers
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