Every human relationship needs an occasional reboot... and so does a marriage! Here are a few great tips for what to do when the "disconnect" happens.
“…in the world you have tribulation…”(John 16:33), and some of our “tribulation” comes through marriage, families, friendships, neighbors and co-workers! Every human relationship needs an occasional reboot!
To reboot is to start again, to reset, to clear certain memory to make it work properly once again, and then proceed. Marriages and other relationships need a “reboot” when we have disappointed one another, forgotten important dates (like birthdays or anniversaries), lost our temper, or been unkind.
In marriage, we often need a reboot as we make our way through various stages of marriage:
1) When the honeymoon phase subsides, a second honeymoon often helps.
2) After children come along, a weekend away is recommended.
3) When the “nest” is empty, a cruise can often be a reboot.
One of the most common relational “disconnects” happens when one person is disappointed or rejected, upset or irritated, and instead of responding with care or compassion, we give facts or reasons. We give “pep talks” or try to “fix it.” Even worse, we communicate how our offense or hurt is much more painful.
Consider for a moment Jesus’ invitation to take His yoke upon you and learn of Him (Matthew 11). The imagery is of Christ standing before us in the yoke, but the other side of the yoke is empty. Now imagine that Christ stands before you as the One who is the essence of love and invites you to take the other side of His yoke.
Take a few moments to meditate and allow the Holy Spirit to implant the truth of this scripture deeply into your heart and spirit. Picture Christ, however you imagine Him, sandaled feet, flowing robes, or bearded face, standing before you. Imagine now His whispered words. Maybe He speaks first to husbands, as the Lord would say, “I’m often times thinking of her, taking thought of her, encouraging her, affirming her, but a great deal of the time I do it without you. Husbands would you take the other side of this yoke and together, let’s love her well.”
In a similar way, wives imagine Christ standing before you in His side of the yoke. He says to you, “Would you come now daughter and take the other side of this yoke? Because, I am often times supporting and comforting and affirming your husband, but a great deal of the time I do it without you; I do it alone.”
Would each of you come now and take the other side of the yoke that you might learn of Him? Learn what He knows about your husband; learn what he knows about your wife, so that together you might co-labor with Christ to love this other person well. Would you now allow the Holy Spirit to take a new image deeply into your hearts and spirits that it might radically change our co-laboring with Christ?
- Take a few moments to thank God for His unconditional love and ask Him to develop this type of love not only in your home and family, but also in marriages throughout the nation. You might consider praying using 1 Corinthians 13 as a guideline.
- Pray believing that God is able to bring about a divine reversal in homes that are on the verge of divorce. Ask the Lord to bring wisdom and understanding that genders forgiveness and healing.
- Decree and declare that He is able to restore godly marriages that will encourage the next generation to embrace the value of pro-biblical marriage in the church and society.
Join other Christ-followers who are praying for this AWAKENING INDICATOR: A decrease in divorces and renewed commitment to marriage between a man and a woman in covenant relationship as God intends.