Bringing up Girls in a Sex-Crazed World
I enjoyed dance and cheerleading for many reasons. Not only did I enjoy the athleticism and social time with girlfriends, but there was the prestige that came along with being a dancer and cheerleader. People automatically assume you are attractive, well-liked, and the life of every party. Inevitably male attention followed, and what teenage girl doesn’t want to feel cool and sexy?
My, how times have changed.
As a Jesus-loving mother of two daughters, the thought of them wearing short skirts and capturing boys’ eyes makes me want to place a bubble around them both. I desperately want to protect my girls from the sex-crazed society that screams to them in every TV show, song, and magazine cover. But I can’t.
None of us can. We can’t protect our kids from everything, but by sharing our faith in Jesus and the truth of the Bible, we can prepare them for everything (Proverbs 22:6).
3 Reminders For Mothers Raising Daughters
1. My daughters were born with the same free will and sin as me.
As much as I want to spare my children the painful consequences of sin, I also know they will make mistakes. I will do my best to lay a foundation that teaches them Jesus is the only way to freedom and self-confidence, not following in peers' footsteps or dressing like a reality TV star. And, I will pray for my children to have the knowledge to discern right from wrong just like Hebrews 5:14 describes: “But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.”
Good parenting does not always produce good kids just as bad parenting does not always produce bad kids. The goal of parenting is not to help our kids avoid sin, but rather to raise Jesus-loving children who make Jesus-centered choices.
My children will make mistakes, but I pray they learn from them then pocket that knowledge. I pray that they never stop looking to the Bible when making decisions, especially when it comes to decisions about sex.
2. As a mother, my job is not to produce good girls, but to be a good steward of the gift God blessed me with.
I have two precious daughters and as much as I would love for them to call me their BFF or bestie, that is not why God chose me as their mother.
The Bible is clear about raising the children we are blessed with and leading by example. Proverbs 22:6 says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”
My girls need a biblical display of motherhood to one day lead Christian homes themselves. That means I must let Jesus’ love shine through me and train them accordingly. I must make use of this gift of parenthood to help them become godly women, rather than worldly women, and trust that God’s grace will fill in the holes and spaces that I cannot.
3. I must outline what God has to say about sex and remind them often.
I hope to create an open, loving environment where it is OK to ask questions about sex, one where I can open the Bible and explain that God has a higher purpose for my girls than their sexuality or appearance. Titles, prestige, and a pretty face are no comparison to the beautiful heart of a Christ-loving woman who knows her value is determined by Jesus.
Jesus paid a high price to bring us back into relationship with God (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). Ephesians 2:10 says we are God’s masterpiece. He has made us new in Jesus, so we can do the good things he has planned for us long ago.
Written by Abbie Beusse