A Servant Wife


Pastor Mark Jeske explains the Bible's teachings on gender roles in marriage. Joy is in serving, not being served.

Two generations ago married women were generally referred to by both their husbands’ names, e.g., Mrs. John Smith. One generation ago that was passé and wives’ own first names appeared—Mrs. Judy Smith. Yesterday’s trend was for married women to keep their maiden names even after marriage. Today’s fashion is just to live together and not bother to be married at all.

In these times, the Bible’s teachings about gender roles in marriage must seem quaint and antiquated at best and slavery at worst. “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord” (Ephesians 5:22). Wow! Seriously?

Yes. God really means it and not because the Trinity is chauvinistic. It’s because he designed male and female to dance together most gracefully when a kind and gentle man leads and a loving and supportive wife chooses to let go of some of her autonomy and let him lead.

Why do this? It’s not because men are smarter or more important. Wives, you aren’t doing it primarily for him. You are doing it “as to the Lord.” Jesus would never lie to you. Jesus would never hurt you—His ways are always good and always bring His blessings. Remember—joy is in serving, not being served.

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