5 Practical Ways To Manage and Resolve Conflict


Pastor Derwin Gray writes an open letter to pastors and church planters sharing with them healthy ways to respond to conflict.

Pastor/Church Planter,

Healthy, mature Christ-followers engage and attempt to manage and resolve conflict through the unlimited resources of the Gospel of Grace. Of all the communities on the face of the earth, the Church of Jesus Christ should be the most equipped and effective community to live out conflict resolution.

Here are 5 practical ways to manage and resolve conflict. Thanks to "Help Guide" for this great information:

Unhealthy Responses To Conflict:

An inability to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other person.

Explosive, angry, hurtful, and resentful reactions.

The withdrawal of love, resulting in rejection, isolation, shaming, and fear of abandonment.

An inability to compromise or see the other person’s side.

The fear and avoidance of conflict; the expectation of bad outcomes.

 Healthy Responses To Conflict:

The capacity to recognize and respond to the things that matter to the other person.

Calm, non-defensive, and respectful reactions.

A readiness to forgive and forget, and to move past the conflict without holding resentments or anger.

The ability to seek compromise and avoid punishing.

A belief that facing conflict head on is the best thing for both sides.


“For Christ himself has brought peace to us. He united Jews and Gentiles into one people when, in his own body on the cross, he broke down the wall of hostility that separated us. He did this by ending the system of law with its commandments and regulations. He made peace between Jews and Gentiles by creating in himself one new people from the two groups. Together as one body, Christ reconciled both groups to God by means of his death on the cross, and our hostility toward each other was put to death.”  Ephesians 2:14-16 ESV

Because we have peace with God through Christ, we can attempt to make peace with those whom we are engaged in conflict. We love God by loving people in the midst of conflict. Church, may we teach the world how to manage and resolve conflict.

Marinate on that,

Pastor Derwin


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