“I could never forgive my dad for _____ .”
Have you ever felt that way?
Every human relationship requires us to extend and receive forgiveness along the way. It’s no different with our earthly dads. The thing about forgiveness is that we can choose to—or choose not to—extend it.
It can seem enticing to withhold forgiveness from those who have hurt us. The Enemy tricks us into thinking that by not forgiving someone, we hold some sort of power over them. But actually, by refusing to forgive, we continue to give the past -- the wrongs committed against us and the people who committed them—power over us. Think about it this way. Every time you say, “I’ll never forgive him for ______,” you’re re-living the moment of pain and reinforcing its prominent place in your memory. Jesus didn’t die for us to live enslaved to the wrongs of the past; He bore every wrong done to and by us, so we could live full and free.
The key to being able to forgive those who have wronged us, including our fathers, is to look to the cross. With the cross in view, we recognize how great our sin is, and how much it cost God—the life of his Son!—to forgive us. When we recognize this abundance of unmerited forgiveness we have received, we begin to see that we can extend forgiveness to those who have wronged us, including our dads.
Don’t get me wrong. Forgiveness doesn’t mean putting yourself in harm’s way by ignoring or denying abusive behavior, and it doesn’t mean we turn a blind eye to sin. God didn’t do that for us. Rather, he leveled justice for all our wrongs on his innocent Son. The full wrath for every wrong your father may have inflicted on you was poured out on Jesus at the cross.
When we grasp this, we are freed to forgive our fathers. And in extending forgiveness to them, we actually have the opportunity to send a blessing we may have never received from our earthly fathers back up the family tree. In this way, we can live out the Gospel of extending grace to those who don’t deserve it.
Receive the blessing of forgiveness from your Heavenly Father. Give the blessing of forgiveness to your earthly father, and walk in freedom knowing your Heavenly Father has promised to right every wrong and wipe away every tear forever.