I Am a Pile Queen

If you could see my house right now, you would see piles.  Neat piles, but none the less, still mountains of piles.  Rest assured I know exactly what each pile represents.  What I don’t know is how to attack each pile and when.  It seems as though time escapes me and I pass off my piles for another days To Do List.

Pile number one is located on desk 1 of 2 in my house (yes, I have so many piles I need two desks to hold them all).  It is filled with inspirational pages I tore out of magazines; whether it is a new recipe, an outfit I want to mock, a craft to do with the kids or a layout I really enjoyed since I am a graphic designer in my ‘spare time’.  Also in that pile you may find bills that need to be filed, kids’ artwork waiting for a frame, coupons to be cut out and anything else that did not have a designated home (aka pile) as of yet.

Pile number five is located on desk 2 of 2 that sits alongside my large hermit crab aquarium, home of Beyonce and Larry.  That pile is more like 5 piles in one with tubs, jars, yarn, baskets, magazines, and other random pieces of projects waiting to be completed.  Crafting and projects should be fun, but when I look at this mountain – I slowly back away into the other room and ignore it for as long as I can.

I guess I just feel so overwhelmed at EVERY pile in my house, I just don’t know where to start and I feel like I have to attack each pile in one day.  Clutter stresses me out and I just want to close my eyes, click my heels three times and have it all disappear when I open my eyes again.

I definitely live in a “Hurried Home”, defined by Dr. Tim Kimmel in Little House on the Freeway.  I keep myself pretty busy with three kids, two part time jobs, PTA duties, room mom jobs and just being a mom/wife in general trying to keep our household running smoothly.  I realize that keeping these piles around me, and they grow daily, is only burying the real issues.

I keep myself busy because I don’t want to deal with my underlying problem; depression and anxiety.  I mask it with “I don’t have time to deal with it right now”, “I will do something about it when the kids are older”, “If I just stay busy I can ignore the thoughts in my head another day”…and the list goes on and on.

After just reading Part One of Little House on the Freeway, I have realized that I am letting my family and friends suffer due to my hurried lifestyle.  I have so many calendars and apps on my phone telling me what to do and where to be that I am no longer in control of my own life and relationships.  I can no longer relax because I expect too much of myself, I am a worrier, and by not allowing quiet into my home I have also interrupted the close relationship I used to have with my Savior.

I urge any parent who has multiple piles, lists, and responsibilities to sit back and take note of what is really important to them.  Read this book and realize what a hurried home looks like; you will be shocked it is more familiar than you’d like.  But there is hope: Dr. Tim Kimmel will show you how to overcome what society has taught us to act like and how to change your pace of life into a more intimate and restful one.

-Jenny Gillespie

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