No matter how many golfing buddies, hunting buddies, or bowling buddies, when we get down to it, men are sort of lonely. Oh, we’re surrounded by people… people we work with, live with, go to church with; there are people around all the time.
But as the old psychologist joke goes “No matter where you go, there you are;” still thinking about the same problems, trying to figure out “How am I REALLY doing?”… wondering how your kids are going to turn out, worrying about where the money is going to come from, missing the freedom you had when you were younger… all that stuff.
When a man has a mentor, he’s got someone who understands how all those questions haunt us. Why? Because he’s felt those same questions for years. Mentors don’t have all the answers… no one does. You have to live out your own life to get those. But a mentor has perspective. Having “lived with himself” for a longer time, he’s has more “processing” time for the questions that haunt us as younger men. And he understands how it plays out… how the answers and the questions come together over time.
Loneliness isn’t solved by countless hours of two humans being physically together. And it’s never completely solved for men. But it’s greatly relieved when a man knows that he has a mentor who cares about him. Knowing that his mentor is accessible; that he’s “safe” to talk with, and just knowing that someone is there who understands the deal makes the loneliness less lonely.
